The 35 Balloon Puns and Jokes Blowing Up the Internet

Enjoy some funny balloon puns and jokes with no strings attached.

Not to be brash about it, but we’re feeling pretty confident that the popularity of the following jokes will balloon over night. With the funniest puns and wittiest one-liners, they should go sky-high in no time. But if, for some reason, they go over like a lead balloon, we won’t get deflated. Instead, we’ll take a deep breath and try harder to get people to burst into laughter next time.

Balloons aren’t the only funny thing that goes over your head. These umbrella jokes will too.

Balloon Puns and One-Liners

Balloon joke one-liners that pop.

All these helium balloon jokes are going over my head.
Balloons are such hipsters. They don’t like anything pop culture.
Balloons never seem to stay the same price. There’s always inflation.
I was offered a free ride in a hot air balloon, so I took them up on it.
There was a hole in my balloon; air-go it deflated.

I saw a sailor taking hundreds of balloons aboard his ship. I thought, whatever floats your boat, man.
Authorities say they’ve gotten balloon disease under control, but cases continue to rise.
If I had 100 red balloons but lost one, how many balloons would I have luft?
After being bought by the helium company, the balloon manufacturer’s future was up in the air.
Want to hear a joke about balloons? Oh, wait. It just got away from me.

These balloon puns and jokes will have you bursting into laughter.

Funny Balloon Puns

I’d say these cute balloon puns are to the point, but we don’t use that kind of language around here.

These puns are blowing up.
What’s poppin’?
What’s all the hullaballoon about?
These balloon puns are full of hot air.
Ballooney tunes.
You’re a balloonatic.
It’s a balloonar eclipse.

Funny Balloon Jokes

You don’t have to float through life without funny balloon jokes any longer.

How do balloons feel after getting filled with air? Ec-static.
What kind of music won’t balloons listen to? Pop music.
How do ghosts like to arrange their balloons? In a boo-quet.
Why don’t balloons like the Fall months? Because it’s Octo-burst, Novem-burst, Decem-burst.

What’s a balloon’s least favorite movie? Gone with the Wind.
What car-sharing app do balloons use? Lyft.
Why didn’t the balloons want a new nanny? It could be Mary Poppins.
Why did the balloon leave the crowded party? To get some air.
Why was the balloon actor’s career so short? Because she burst onto the scene.

Balloon Dad Jokes

When you tell these jokesk, don’t blow it. Or do. I guess balloons probably want you to blow it.

Why did the balloon go to the doctor? It was feeling light-headed.
What happens when you squeeze a Smurf balloon? You Papa Smurf.
Why shouldn’t you give Elsa a balloon? She’ll let it go.
Why are kings’ balloons filled only with helium? It’s a noble gas.

What’s a balloon’s favorite dessert? Root beer float.
What’s a balloon’s favorite school subject? Air-rithmetic.
Why did the balloon go to therapy? It was feeling deflated.
What did the clown say after finding two balloons filled with helium? He He.
Why do balloons call carbonated drinks “soda?” The don’t like “pop.”