34 Umbrella Puns and Jokes for Dry Humor Lovers

Umbrella puns and jokes for a rainy day.

Looking for a few laughs? You’ll find them under my umbrella-ella-ella-eh-eh-eh. We’ve got you covered with all the funny umbrella jokes you’ll ever need. The only thing that’ll get wet are your eyes from all the cry-laughing you’ll be doing. But if you don’t find our dry humor hilarious, don’t hold it over our heads. It’s not our fault you like your wit a bit more moist.

Puns about umbrellas aren’t just good in the rain. They’re also perfect for throwing shade at the beach. So be sure to work a few in while you’re cracking everyone up with bodacious beach jokes.

Umbrella Pun One-Liners

Automatically open anyone with a clever umbrella joke one-liner or two.

I heard a new umbrella joke, but it went over my head.
My wife asked me why Santa always carries an umbrella. I said, “Because of all the rain, dear.”
The person who invented the umbrella was going to simply call it “brella,” but then he thought about it for a second.
My wife bought me an expensive umbrella. She’s been holding it over my head ever since.
I don’t trust umbrellas. They’re always covering something up.

I have a bunch of funny umbrella jokes, but I’m saving them for a rainy day.
My umbrella broke in half. Fortunately, there’s only a 50% chance of rain today.
The layoffs at the parasol factory really cast a shadow over the whole town.
I’d love to hear more umbrella puns, but I’ll have to take rain check.
I took a promotion at the umbrella company, but I was in over my head.

Umbrella puns and jokes are so fun-brella.

Funny Umbrella Jokes

Make it rain laughter with these humorously cute umbrella dad jokes.

What do weathermen use to do bicep curls? Dumb-brellas.
What do you call shoes made of umbrellas? Pair-a-soles.
Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella? Fo drizzle.
What do you call a funny parasol? A pun-brella.
What movie do umbrellas hate? Gone with the Wind.

Why did the woman take her umbrella to therapy? So it would open up.
What do blind people use to stay dry in the rain? An um-braille-a.
What Central American country makes the best umbrellas? Nic-paragua.
What do you call two umbrellas that are meant for each other? Para-soulmates.
Why do rappers always carry an umbrella? In case they see a Lil Wayne.

Why did the umbrella have to move and change its identity? It went into the wetness protection program.
What do you call Winnie-the-Pooh when he forgets his umbrella? A drizzly bear.
What do you call a singing parasol? A hum-brella.
What fast-food restaurant should you never take an umbrella to? Windy’s.