125 Ghost Jokes and Puns to Look Through

When it comes to the supernatural, we have only one goal: to exorcise your funny bone. To do that, we’ve conjured up a cursed collection of ghost jokes and puns guaranteed to activate the spirits within. From lively plays on words to downright spooky one-liners, these ghastly gags have the rite stuff to cast out boredom and gloom. When you hear the following paranormal punch lines, you’re likely to start levitating and speaking in tongues. Or maybe just cracking up so much that you snort or something.

Of course, Halloween wouldn’t be the same without a good ghost pun, especially if the little ones are dressing up as ghostly characters this year. Whether their costume is on the Beetlejuice side or white sheet with a couple holes cut out, you can summon their spirits with a few hilarious ghost jokes for kids. They’ll be possessed by all the fun they can have.

On the other hand, if you’re staying home to greet trick-or-treaters, we’ve got even more haunted humor that’ll spook those Halloween hustlers. With a rash of witch puns, a flurry of Frankenstein jokes, and a vault of vampire quips, you’ll be able to pass out king-size laughs – along with king-size candy – to all the little characters who come to your door.

Ghost Jokes

Fair warning: laughing too at hard at these puns might make you give up the ghost.

• What do ghosts serve at dinner parties? Poultrygeist.
• What do you call a ghost’s mother and father? Transparents.
• What do ghost pandas eat? Bam-boo.
• Where do ghosts go swimming? The Dead Sea.
• What exercise glass did the ghost take? SoulCycle.
• What kind of makeup do ghosts put on the eye? Ma-scare-a.
• What religion do ghosts follow? Boo-dism.
• What do you call a ghost that goes to church? Apparishioner.
• What do ghosts order at Chipotle? Boo-rrito bowls.

• What month has the most poltergeist encounters? Aughost.
• What do you call male ghosts? Polterguys.
• Who speaks on behalf of all ghosts? Their spooksperson.
• What’s a ghost’s favorite Shakespearian play? Romeo and Ghouliet.
• What do you call a bunch of ghost flowers? Booquets.
• Why couldn’t the ghost shoot the deer? He didn’t have a haunting license.
• Where do supernatural beings get their food? At the ghost-ery store.
• How did the ghost order its steak? Medium.
• Where do most Turkish ghosts live? Instan-boo.

Ghost Jokes for Kids

If you were looking for more transparency in your humor, you’ve come to the right place.

• What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert? Ice scream.
• What do ghosts wear to help them see better? Spooktacles.
• What did the ghost teacher say to the class? Keep your eyes on the board while I go through it again.
• What do ghosts do around the campfire? Tell scary human stories.
• What was the ghost’s job on the haunted airplane? Fright attendant.
• Where do ghosts go on vacation? The Boohamas.
• Where do baby ghosts stay while their ghost parents are at work? The day-scare.
• What colors do ghosts wear on the Fourth of July? Red, white, and boo.

• Why are ghosts terrible liars? Because you can see right through them.
• What kind of stores do ghosts own? Bootiques.
• What lake has the most ghost hauntings? Lake Eerie.
• Who did the ghost take to the dance? His ghoul-friend.
• What room don’t ghosts need in a house? The living room.
• How do ghosts greet one another at the start of each day? Good moaning!
• What do ghosts use in the Outback? A boo-merang.
• Why didn’t the ghost dance at the party? He had no body to dance with.

Funny Ghost Jokes

We don’t really know whether ghost are real. What we do know is that the jokes are real funny – especially the more mature ghost jokes for adults.

• What kind of horse do ghosts ride? A night mare.
• What do ghosts put on bagels? Scream cheese.
• What position do ghosts play in soccer? Ghoulkeeper.
• What do baby ghosts wear on their feet? Boo-ties.
• Why didn’t the ghost eat his breakfast? He doesn’t have the stomach for it.
• Why did the ghost jump off a bridge? He was banshee jumping.
• What city in Alabama has the most ghost sightings? Hauntsville.
• What type of music do ghosts play? Sheet music.

• Where do rich ghosts live? Mali-boo.
• What do you call a ghost drag queen? RuPaul-tergeist.
• Did you hear about the ghost who didn’t pay his mortgage? His house was repossessed.
• Why don’t monsters like to eat ghosts? They taste like sheet.
• What do ghosts drink at bars? Boos.
• What did the mother ghost say to the kid ghost on Halloween? Before you go trick or treating, remember to take a sheet.
• How can you tell a girl ghost from a boy ghost? Boooobs!
• What’s the technical term for ghost boobies? Paranormal entitties.

Ghost Dad Jokes

You don’t need a medium to communicate with these ghoulish goofs. Some say they can even hear skeleton puns during séances.

• What’s a ghost’s favorite tree? Ceme-trees.
• What game do ghosts play? Hide and shriek.
• What fruit do ghosts eat? Boo-berries.
• How do ghosts make their eggs? They terri-fry them.
• What’s every ghost’s favorite Steinbeck novel? Grapes of Wraith.
• Why don’t ghosts like the rain? It dampens their spirits.
• What kind of pants do ghosts wear? Boo jeans.
• How does a ghost unlock a door? With a spookey.
• Who did the ghost invite to his Halloween party? Any old friend he could dig up.

• How did the ghost get from New York to London? British Scare-ways.
• What does Cupid use on Halloween? A boo and arrow.
• What do ghosts eat in Hungary? Ghoulash.
• Where do they eat it? Boo-dapest.
• What’s the ghost’s favorite Star Trek movie? The Wraith of Khan.
• What do ghosts eat for lunch? Boo-logna sandwiches.
• What do ghost monkeys eat? Boo-nanas.
• Which ghost is the best dancer? The Boo-gie Man.
• Where did ghosts drink during prohibition? At spookeasies.

Ghost One-Liners

An irrevenant list of knee-slapping plays on words that are great for parties.

• A ghost walks into a bar at 12:30 a.m. The bartender says, “I’m sorry, but we don’t serve spirits after midnight.”
• I had to break up with the ghost last night. She just wasn’t ghoul-friend material.
• The most supernatural encounters happen on the West Ghost.
• I once told a bad joke about ghosts. It still haunts me to this day.
• I found out my girlfriend is really a ghost. I had my suspicions the moment she walked through the door.
• I have to admit – I didn’t come up with all these spooky jokes. They’re by my ghostwriter.

• I can’t have too much Halloween candy. Gotta keep my ghoulish figure.
• I dressed up as a ghost for Halloween last year and got totally sheet-faced.
• I wish you’d stop calling me Casper. You know I’m not a fan, Tom.
• Thankfully, our new ghost was not a moaning person.
• Ghosts can’t be prosecuted for body stealing because possession is 9/10ths of the law.
• The ghost in house wanted to lose weight so we started exorcising.

Ghost Puns

Something possessed us to give you this spectral wordplay.

• Hey, boo.
• You’re so boo-tiful.
• Ghouls just wanna have fun.
• Absolutely fa-boo-lous!
• Roller-ghoster of love.
• It’s like déjà boo all over again.
• Ghosts live on dead end street.

• Ghosts love soul food.
• He’s got a boo-ger.
• Ghost jokes are boo-ring.
• You go, ghoul!
• Be wraith-onable.
• Demons are a ghoul’s best friend.
• Did the little ghost get a boo-boo?

Funny Ghost Puns

Daylight come and me wan’ go home…to hear more hysterical phantom funnies!

• That was a wail of a ghost pun.
• Peek-a-boo!
• Thank god it’s Fright-day.
• Polter-goose.
• That’s the spirit!
• You’re dis-ghost-ing.
• Boo-yah!

• You really lift my spirits.
• Ghoul-oriented.
• Un-boo-lievable.
• You can’t e-wraith your past.
• Isn’t it orbvious?
• Boo hoo!
• Ghosts do phantomime.

Cute Ghost Puns

More short sayings along with a few funny ghost names.

• This is boo sheet.
• The ghost with the most.
• Purr-anormal cat-ivity.
• Manifest destiny.
• Making ghost jokes is ta-boo.
• Shake your booty.
• My body’s so boo-tilicious.
• Feel my wraith!

• Ryan Ghost-ling.
• Ghoulia Roberts.
• Boo-wen Yang.
• A-wraith-a Franklin.
• Ghoulda Radner.
• Boo Nix
• Ghost-av Mahler.
• Wraith Witherspoon.
• Scott Ghoul-oway.

You Ask, We Answer

These ghost questions have been haunting us, so we had to manifest some answers.