86 Cat Puns and Jokes You Should Read Right Meow

These cat puns and jokes are litterally purrfect.

Some people get really serious when talking about cats. But us? We’re always kitten around. Our furry feline friends are full of funny moments, and the stars of some of the best memes ever. That’s why we’re letting the cat out of the bag with a comical collection of cute puns and jokes. These hilarious wisecracks will make you laugh so hard you may cough up a hairball.

Cats not your thing? We get it. That’s why we’ve got even more animal puns – from land to sea – to dive into.

Super Cute Cat Puns

Short and sweet, these precious puns will give you that warm and fuzzy feeling inside. So will some adorable rabbit jokes.

• Check meowt!
• Pitch purrfect.
• Litterally.
• Fur real.
• Are you kitten me?

• That cat has purrsonality.
• The whole kitten caboodle.
• How you like meow?
• What a cat-astrophe!
• All kitten aside.
• You’re really stressing meowt!

Funny Cat Puns

Make your words more interesting with the best cat one-liners. Do it right meow.

• Cats are pawsome!
• It’s meow or never.
• Happy purrthday!
• Be-claws I said so.
• Meow you’re talkin’.

• Feline the burn.
• I’m not amewsed.
• Purr-haps not.
• Live long and pawsper.
• It’s moggie out today.
• Clawsome!

Clever Cat Puns and One-Liners

Trying to think of a funny caption for your next Instagram post? Cat got your tongue? This list of cat one-liners and longer puns are on another level.

• Cats think everyone else is in-fur-ior.
• Dogs can’t operate MRI machines, but CAT Scan.
• Pawdon me. Would you have any Grey Purrpon?
• If your cat-lady friend is in danger of having too many cats, tell her that getting another one will only clowder judgment.
• PNW cats are so paw-sive aggressive.
• That’s right up your alley, cat.

• How are you feline today?
• Let’s get this paw-ty started!
• You’ve gato be kidding me.
• I’m not really feline it today.
• I don’t like your cat-titude.
• Please don’t stop the mewsic.
• Take meowt to the ballgame.

Cat Names

Call your kitty something silly.

• Meowchaelangelo.
• RuPaw.
• Shakespurr.
• Cleopawtra.
• Catryn Hepburn.
• Purrscilla.
• Cindy Clawford.
• Catrick.

• Meowses.
• Jessicat
• Purrincess.
• Clawdia.
• Apawllo.
• Lucifur.
• Bing Clawsby.
• Jabba the Cat.

Funny Cat Jokes

Here’s a fancy feast of fresh jokes for you to get friskie with.

• Where did the cat astronaut go? Meowter space.
• Why don’t German cats live very long? Because they have nein lives.
• What do you call a lazy cat that watches TV all day? A couch purrtato.
• Why was the cat so small? Because it ate condensed milk.
• Who brings all the good kittens presents at Christmas? Santa Claws.

• How do cats say they’re sorry? They apawlogize.
• What do cats eat for dessert? Chocolate mouse.
• Why did the cat want to visit Egypt? To see the purramids.
• Who is the most famous kittie lover? Catsanova.
• Why did the cat start a side hustle? To make paw-sive income.

Clean Cat Jokes

Let’s keep this paw-ty rolling with some old-fashioned kitty crack-ups. Just don’t tell the birds.

• Why don’t lazy kitties ever get anything done? They’re procatstinators.
• Why do cats always lose at pool? They love to scratch.
• Why do cats make good salesmen? They’re very purrsausive.
• What do cats take for their allergies? An anti-hiss-tamine.
• What do you call a fluffy male cat asleep on sofa? A himalayan.

• What’s a kitty’s favorite book? The Great Catsby.
• What did the cat order at the Italian restaurant? Pawsta.
• What do you call a cat teacher? Purrfessor.
• Why do cats always beat dogs in video games? Because they have nine lives.
• What do cats eat for breakfast? Mice Krispies.
• What do you call a cat that won’t give up? Purrsistent.

Cat Dad Jokes

Don’t fur-get about these classic jokes. They won’t get your kitty down from the tree, but at least you can have a few laughs while it’s up there.

• What do cats like to draw? Self pawtraits.
• Where do cats put their money? In their purrse.
• Which day of the week do cats love the most? Caturday.
• What kind of car do cats drive? Fur-raris.
• What do cats read while pooping? Litterary works.

• Why don’t cats play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.
• What do you call a confused cat? Purrplexed.
• Why do cats make bad office managers? They have terrible littership skills.
• What’s a cat’s favorite dessert? A mice cream cone.
• Why was the cat sitting on the computer? He wanted to keep an eye on the mouse.

• What cocktail do cat bartenders specialize in? Whisker sour.
• What color is cats’ favorite? Purrple.
• If a cat loses its tail, where does it go? The retail store.
• What do kittens like to have at birthday parties? A pounce house.

You Ask, We Answer

It’s time to cough up some hairball answers to your cat questions.