68 Whale Puns and Jokes You Can Ba-lean On

Have a whale of a time with these killer puns and jokes.

Does life have you feeling a little over-whale-med? If so, we’ve got you covered with a ton of funny puns and jokes that are sure to activate your blowhole. We’ve filtered through the most hysterical wisecracks around to curate a killer collection of quips that are whale worth your time. And we’ve topped it all off with some salty new jokes that you’re sure to love. So crack your bar-knuckles and scroll down to enjoy these well sea-soned takes.

Want more? Check out other puns from the deep, including our fresh crab jokes and scintillating shrimp quips.

Eye-Watering Whale Puns

These plays on words pack a whale of a punch. Share with your friends, caption your next Instagram post, or enjoy them whale you work.

• Whale, hello there.
• Alive and whale.
• The wishing whale.
• Business as usuwhale.
• I whaley appreciate it!

• He means whale.
• Whale, la de da.
• I’ll have the usuwhale.
• The usuwhale suspects.
• All is whale.

Funny Whale Puns

Find your porpoise with these cute puns and one-liners.

• I whale always love you.
• Everything whale be all right.
• You whaley shouldn’t have!
• That was whale worth the wait.
• Where there’s whale, there’s a way.

• Life’s a breach.
• You’re krillin’ me!
• Whale, whale, whale. What have we got here?
• I’m going in for the krill.
• Health and whale-ness.

Killer Whale Puns and One-Liners

The best whale wordplay in the ocean.

• That whale’s an orca-holic.
• These whale puns are killer.
• You’re whalecome.
• Ba-lean on me.
• So long, fare-whale.

• That’s all whale and good.
• Whale you marry me?
• Whale you be my valentine?
• All’s whale that ends whale.
• Life can be so over-whale-ming.

Funny Whale Jokes

Looking for a new joke about these amazing sea creatures? Then we’ve got a whale of them for you.

• What do you call a gossipy whale? Blubbermouth.
• Who designs whale houses? Orcatects.
• What do you call an orca that likes books? Whale read.
• What country are Jewish whales from? Is-whale.
• What country artist do sea creatures listen to? Whale-on Jennings.

• Why did the whale accidentally bump into the boat? He didn’t do it on porpoise.
• What do you call a humpback that speaks two languages? Biling-whale.
• What about one that goes both ways? Bisexu-whale.
• How about a smart one? Intellectu-whale.
• One that’s on time? Punctu-whale.

Classic Whale Jokes

Here are some good ole jokes that are sure to have you whaling with laughter.

• What do whales eat with malt vinegar? Fish and ships.
• Why don’t whales eat fast food? Because they can’t catch it.
• How do whales plan parties? They orcanize them.
• What do whales listen to on their commute? A podcast.
• How do you get banned from Sea World? Free Willy.

• What do you call a group of musical whales? Orcastra.
• What did the dolphin say to the sick orca? Get whale soon.
• What do whales like to chew? Blubber gum.
• Where do killer whales go to get braces? The orca-dontist.
• Why are they called sperm whales? Because they were discovered by seamen.

Whale Dad Jokes

Keep blubbering on with even more knee-slapping whale humor. And be sure to check out some snappy shark jokes too.

• What game show do orca’s watch? Whale of Fortune.
• Why do whales like saltwater? Pepper makes them sneeze.
• What do you get when you cross a cow with a whale? Shamoo.
• What do whales like to do on date night? Netflix and krill.
• How do you get two whales in a car? Start in England and drive west.

• Why should you never enter into a contract with a whale? They always breach it.
• Where are Latino orcas from? Venez-whale-a.
• Where do orcas board the train? At the whale-way station.
• What’s the whale’s favorite movie? The Humpback of Notre Dame.
• Which James Bond movie do whales love? License to Krill.

More Jokes about Whales

Dive into some hilarious whale humor with your friends.

• Where do orcas bank? Whales Fargo.
• What do you call a rich orca? Whale-thy.
• What kind of a meal do whales bring food to share? A podluck.
• What did the humpback say to the blue whale? Cheer up.

• What is a whale’s favorite sandwich? Krilled cheese.
• What did the whale find on the spiritual retreat? His porpoise.
• What’s a whale’s favorite flower? Orcad.
• What do whales like to paint with? A-krill-ic.

You Ask, We Answer

Killer answers to your salty questions about whales.