50 Sheep Puns and Jokes That’ll Get You Pasture Problems

Sheep humor for shear comedy enjoyment.

Just because people are usually trying to fall asleep when they think of sheep doesn’t mean all sheep are boring. For one thing, they’re woolly good for making puns and jokes. You know – the kind people flock to. And who doesn’t love cozying up in the winter with a warm wool sweater. But when the sheep hits the fan, a good laugh is exactly what ewe need. So get your sheep puns fix with the good, the ba-a-a-d, and the ugly. Be sure to shear with your friends.

Even though there’s mutton better than sheep humor, don’t miss out on our other animal puns. Dive into a sea of hilarious crab puns and funny whale jokes. Or stay on dry land with the most deer-licious deer puns ever.

Cute Sheep Puns

Sheep puns almost as cute as that sweater.

• Time to go home little lamb. It’s pasture bedtime.
• I’m ewe-nique.
• Fleece Navidad!
• Much ado about mutton.
• Ewe-se your brain.
• Have you herd the one about sheep?
• Are you not am-ewe-sed?

• Same as ewe-sual.
• The ewe-sual suspects.
• Business as ewe-sual.
• I’ll have the ewe-sual.
• Those lambs are ram-bunctious.
• I feel so ewe-sed.
• Please don’t stop the m-ewe-sic.

Funny Sheep Puns

The funniest sheep puns you’ve ever herd.

• Ba-a-a-ad to the bone.
• Nice rack…of lamb.
• Oh sheep.
• Sit the flock down.
• I don’t give a sheep.
• There are ram-ifications.

Sheep One-Liners

Enjoy these funny sheep one-liners without ram-ifications.

• A sheep, a drum, and a snake all fell off a cliff. Baa dum tss.
• He told the lamb to sheep up or shear out.
• What do sheep count when they fall asleep?
• “That lamb was delicious.”
  “Did you hogget all? How much is left?”
  “Mutton.”
• You woolly have to sheep it to believe it.
• The shepherd found his missing sheep by shear luck.
• Are immigrant sheep offered ram-nesty?

New Sheep Dad Jokes

Un-ewe-sually funny dad jokes fresh from the farm. Or station. Or sheepyard if they’re coming in from overseas.

• Dad, how much do wool sweaters cost? I don’t know, but they don’t come sheep.
• What health food are groups of sheep eating? Flocks seed.
• How did the sheep get to the hospital after losing the fight? A ram-bulance.
• What hippie game do sheep play? Haggis-sack.
• How do Spanish sheep say congratulations? Fleece-idades.

• What do you call an unmarried ram? A ba-a-a-chelor.
• What channel do conservative sheep watch? Flocks News.
• Why did the SWAT team have a sheep? It was their battering ram.
• What do you call a rookie sheep? A ramateur.
• How do ram chefs prepare chicken thighs? They batter them.

Classic Sheep Jokes

We’re giving these old sheep jokes a new fleece on life.

• Hey, sheep. What’s up? Mutton much.
• What streaming app do sheep watch? Ewe-tube.
• Are ewe eating more? Yeah, I have two empty stomachs.
• Where do Mormon sheep live? Ewe-tah
• Why was the sheep’s computer so fast? It had a lot of RAM.

• What channel do Spanish-speaking sheep watch? Ewe-nivision.
• What kind of car was the sheep driving? A Lamb-ourghini.
• How do you keep a ram from charging? Take away his credit card.
• What do you call sheep that are always cleaning up? Room-baa.

• What do sheep say when toasting drinks? Shears!
• Why could the married ewe sleep with other rams? She had an open relation-sheep.
• What do you call sheep paradise? Ewe-topia.
• Why did the ram’s phone die? He forgot to charge the battery.