75 Labor Day Jokes and Puns That Work Hard for the Funny

It may be Labor Day, but funny job jokes never take a day off. That’s because cracking wise about work is anything but a grind. So instead of putting a cover sheet on that TPS report, take a break with these occupational one-liners. Cause whether you have to labor on Labor Day or not, you’ve deserve a laugh that isn’t your paycheck.

If you happen to get hurt on the job by a construction puns mishap, tell the hospital staff some funny nurse jokes, and you might get better faster.

Labor Day Jokes

These funny Labor Day gags punch in on time.

• Why don’t comedians tell jokes about Labor Day? They don’t work.
• Why aren’t boys born on Labor Day? There’s no male delivery.
• When is Labor Day? About 9 months after Father’s Day.
• What day are the most babies are born? Labor Day.
• Why did the calendar factory worker get fired? He took Labor Day off.
• Why are locksmiths open on Labor Day? They are key workers.

• If you don’t have to work on Labor Day, shouldn’t it be called No Labor Day?
• The medicine factory was so quiet on Labor Day, you could hear a cough drop.
• I’m staying in bed all day. It’s Lay-bor Day.
• There’s nothing to do on La-bore Day.
• Do pigs celebrate La-boar Day?

Labor Day Dad Jokes

Funny jokes to get you through your work day.

• What do you call it when everyone calls in sick? A staff infection.
• What do you call a snake that works for the government? A civil serpent.
• How many people work in your company? About half.
• What’s the best part about working in Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
• What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!

• Why was the lamp store open only on weekends? Business was light.
• What do dentists call x-rays? Tooth pics.
• What’s the best way to end a meeting? Start another one.
• How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, but the lightbulb really has to want to change.
• Why did the can crusher quit this job? It was soda pressing.

• How do you like working as a tailor? It’s so-so.
• What do biologists wear to work on Casual Friday? Genes.
• What job has you asking people to pick their noses? Plastic surgeon.
• Do you know what they say about a clean desk? It’s a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
• What do you call a magician who’s lost his magic? Ian.
• Why did the employee get fired from Pepsi? They found Coke in his system.

Labor Day One-Liners

Clock in for some good work humor.

• After all those years working as a limousine driver, I don’t have much to chauffeur it.
• There’s no training to be a garbage man. You just pick it up as you go along.
• I got a job at a paperless office. Everything was great until I needed to use the bathroom.
• I used to be a professional butt model. It was my carear.
• I just lost my job as a psychic. I did not see that coming.

• My coworkers tell me I’m condescending. That means I talk down to people.
• I quit working for Nike. I just couldn’t do it anymore.
• Working on a ship pays just enough to stay afloat.
• Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now.
• I kneaded dough so I got a job as a baker.

Job One-Liners

Jokes for Labor Day that work, work, work, work, work, work.

• I have some jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work.
• My wife tells me I talk in my sleep all the time, but I’m skeptical. Nobody at work has mentioned it.
• Now that I’ve gotten into astronomy, my whole career is looking up.
• I used to own a paper company, but it folded.
• I wanted to be a professional poker player, but it wasn’t in the cards.
• I had to quit my job at the helium factory. I refuse to be spoken to in that tone.

• I was considering working for Uber, but I don’t have the drive.
• I tried being a movie extra, but it wasn’t my scene.
• I thought about becoming a witch, so I tried that for a spell.
• I got laid off from the unemployment office and still had to show up the next day.
• My career at the stationery company isn’t going anywhere.

Work Day Jokes

A three-day weekend’s worth of work wit.

• I started my business with nothing, and I still have most of it.
• Sure I’m willing to work longer hours. As long as they’re lunch hours.
• I stopped doing handyman work. I couldn’t live on a fixed income.
• I always wanted to be a barber, but I couldn’t cut it.
• To err is human. To blame it on someone else shows management potential.
• I keep trying to start an airline, but it never takes off.

• My boss told a joke during our video call today. It wasn’t even remotely funny.
• From the moment I became an archaeologist, my career was in ruins.
• I don’t really like working as a waiter. But hey, at least it puts food on the table.
• I liked my job as a bank teller, until I lost interest.
• I had to quit working as an elevator repairman. I couldn’t handle all the ups and downs.
• I got burned out working as a fireman.

• I wasn’t feeling fulfilled as a phlebotomist. All my work was in vein.
• I didn’t get the job in Australia because I was un-koala-fied.
• I love being a maze designer. I get completely lost in my work.
• Working at the call center was not for me. I don’t answer to anyone.
• I tried working at the IRS, but it was too taxing.

Funny Work One-Liners

Pulling some overtime to get you more Labor Day sayings.

• Inspecting mirrors is a job I could really see myself doing.
• Our computers went down at work today, so we had to do everything by hand. It took me 15 minutes to shuffle the cards for solitaire.
• I told a joke during our video call today. It wasn’t even remotely funny.
• The first five days after the weekend are the hardest.
• I used to be a professional bowler. I’ll spare you the details.

• I’m thinking about working search and rescue. They’re always looking for people.
• I got fired after one day on the bomb squad, but I had a blast.
• Started working as a plumber. Now my whole career is in the toilet.
• I get plenty of exercise at work – I’m always jumping to conclusions, pushing my luck, and dodging deadlines.
• I always tell new hires, “Don’t think of me as your boss but as a friend who can fire you.”