46 Tomato Puns and Jokes So Funny You’ll Paste Them Everywhere

You say to-may-to puns, I say to-mah-to puns.

Tomato puns and jokes have a nice a-Roma to them.

We’ll be honest: Some of the following tomato puns and jokes are just plum funny. And some are so bad you’ll probably want to throw tomatoes at us. That’s okay – we get it. We’re ripe for the picking. But just remember that no mater how rotten these gags and one-viners get, they’re always a salad choice for laughs.

Don’t stop here au-tomato-cally. We’ve got a buffet of funny food puns. From cute cucumber puns to cheerful chip quips, it’s an all-you-can-pun extravaganza.

Funny Tomato Puns

These tomato puns are funny any way you slice ’em.

Tomadon’t!
Italian tomatoes like to Roma-round.
Heinz-sight is 20-20.
Green tomatoes just need some experience.
Copy/tomato paste.

Phan-tomato of the Opera.
Tomato-lly.
Automatomobile.
Tomatoes are so saucy!
I’m plum out of tomatoes.

Chuckle Daddy had to give these puns and jokes an ul-tomato.

Cute Tomato Puns

Tomato puns that have the ripe stuff.

I love you from my head tomatoes.
You mater to me.
Here today, gone tomato.
Vine-ally!
These tomatoes are grape.

I had to give the salad makers an ul-tomato.
I’m doing vine. How are you?
Tomatoes are souper!
Tomatoes always cherry me up.
Everything is vine.

Tomato One-Liners

Hysterical tomato jokes and one-liners to soup up your day.

I tried to email the vegetable company but I only got an au-tomato-ed response.
Think you can ketchup to me?
Tom-ate-o the food last night.
She’s got the ripe stuff.

These tomatoes live in a seedy part of town.
Tomatoes live to get revenge. They’re vine-dictive as hell.
I’m going to fix a salad. Can I borrow your toma-tools?
The tomatoes they gave me weren’t ready to eat yet. What a ripe-off.

Ripe Tomato Dad Jokes

These tomato dad jokes are fresh off the vine.

What do you call a flying tomato? An air-loom.
What kind of boat do you need to sail the Marinara-bbean Sea? A tomato sloop.
How do tomatoes listen to music? On vine-yl.
What do you call a vegetable hurricane? A tor-mato.
What’s Homer Simpson’s favorite (vegetable)? Toma-doh!

What do you make marinara bread with? Tomadough.
Who’s the leader of the tomatoes? The caprese-dent.
What does tomato soup wear in the rain? A gaz-poncho.
Who gives the sermons at salad church? The tomato paste-r.

Classic Tomato Jokes

These funny jokes were compiled using an au-tomato-ed system.

What kind of tomato smells the best? A-Roma.
What do tomatoes and potatoes have in common? Toes.
What’s the worst part of salsa dancing? Getting the tomato stains out afterward.
Why do people like basil in tomato soup? It’s soup-herb!
Why was the tomato blushing? Because it saw the salad dressing.

How do you glue two vegetables together? With tomato paste.
What’s the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
How do you get rid of unproductive tomatoes? Can them.
What dance do tomatoes do? Salsa.